I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
