Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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