oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
