i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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