Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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