Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
