I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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