They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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