Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
