This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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