I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Randomize
