I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
