i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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