im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
