what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
