where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
