Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
