She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
