1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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