Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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