my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
