My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.