There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Randomize
