Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Welp...herpes.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
