bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He's a Shit stain on my heart
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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