i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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