He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
this just has baby written all over it
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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