just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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