oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
This is my gift to your gina
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Congratulations! We have a period
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