Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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