she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Barsexuality is the new black.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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