I wanna bring you to show and tell
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
nutella sex= disaster
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
