I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Randomize
