So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
