So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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