Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
