I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize
