don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
