Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
