If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
