Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
