Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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