Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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