Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize