Whod you bang
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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