hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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