I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
