So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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