The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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