some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
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